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Out with the Old, in with the Flu

1/19/2021

2 Comments

 
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I know, everyone was excited to see the end of 2020.  It was a year we would all like to forget, but there is little chance of that.  And, I believe that for some reason, we knew - or at least certainly hoped - that the new year had to be better.  It just had to be. 

Well, my new year didn't start off well. 

And, the old one didn't end so very well either.  Symptoms started off slowly, but I found myself unusually tired.  I went to bed early on Christmas Eve and again on Christmas Day.  After that, I just stayed in bed . . . for four weeks.  So, if your math is good, you can see that the old year ended the same way the new year began for me.  I was sick in bed with no good reason to ring in the new year.

My symptoms were weird.  I had little or no fever, no chills, no sneezing, and little coughing.  I had over-all body aches and fatigue.  And, if I tried to get out of bed, I felt dizzy and woozy.  So, I stayed in bed.  Nothing changed.  I didn't get any better or worse for two weeks.  I just remained in bed, exhausted.

My brother stayed with me during this time.  It was more because I had a functioning car and he didn't.  If he stayed with me, he could still drive to work.  He is a much better chef in the kitchen than me.  But, for whatever reason, he has discovered T.V. dinners -- and he likes them.  How is that possible?  I have no idea.  Swanson invented the frozen meal back in 1954.  It was an instant icon, so very trendy and ultra-modern.  But, as far as I'm concerned, T.V. dinners should have gone the way of lava lamps, bell bottoms, Cabbage Patch dolls, leg warmers, Hot Wheels, mood rings and Gangnam Style.

One night, after about eleven days in bed, my brother needed my help with an airline ticket.  I had to sit up in bed, check out some things on the computer for him, and give him some instructions.  It had to be done.  He needed my help.  There was nobody else to help him out.  So, I sat up, getting woozier by the minute, and helped him with his problems.  By the time everything was resolved, I was an exhausted wreck.  It took me a long time to recover, and I decided then and there that it was time to go to Urgent Care in the morning to find out what I had and how to fix it.

Fortunately for me, I live in a very convenient location.  There was an Urgent Care center perhaps two minutes from my home.  In these times of Covid-19, I just couldn't walk in the front door.   I had to text them, wait for a call, answer too many questions, and then go into Urgent Care when they were ready for me.

It was almost too far for me to walk.  I wasn't sure I'd make it to the examination room.  Thankfully, I did.  I had a test for the flu, another for Covid-19, and some chest x-rays.  There might have been more tests, but I don't remember.  At one point the nurse asked if I'd ever had pneumonia.  I said, "Not that I remember, but I did have malaria five times."  She'd never had that answer before.  I'd never had pneumonia either, but x-rays indicated there's a first time for everything.  As far as other results that day, the flu test was negative and the Covid-19 test was positive.  Yikes!  What?  I was told to go on to the hospital where they would check me in for a few days.  That wasn't at all what I expected to hear.

I drove myself to the hospital.

When I arrived, I wasn't exactly sure where to go.  So, I walked in the main entrance.  One woman greeted me with, "Hello, how can I help you?"  But, very fortunately, another woman asked, "Would you like a wheelchair?"  It was an excellent suggestion.  They strolled me down to the Emergency Room. 

More tests.  Blood drawn.  Clips and needles were placed on various parts of my body.  And, I was thoroughly checked over.  Throughout the experience, I realized I was now on the front line of defense against this nasty virus.  At least a dozen health workers came into my room for various reasons.  Some wore masks.  Others wore additional face shields.  But, all of them knew that I had tested positive for the coronavirus.  It didn't stop a one of them from doing their job.  I heard throughout 2020, that year we all want to forget, that the health workers around the world are heroes.  This was my first time to actually see them with my own eyes.  It was humbling.

The doctor who finally checked me over said that he, too, had fought his own personal battle with that virus for eleven or twelve days back in February or March.  A lot has happened in the world since then.  That was before the world really knew how to treat this virus.  That was before several different treatments have proven successful.  It was when this was at its scariest.  He faced it all bravely, lived to tell about it, and then returned to take care of people like me.  This doctor, whose name I never actually caught, was the biggest hero I met in the Emergency Room.  He also said words that really comforted me, "What made you come to the hospital at the tail end of this virus?"  I was so pleased - and very relieved - to learn I was at the tail end.  It had been a long haul with little change in symptoms.  But, just hearing that I was near the end of this experience was such wonderful news.

Then, bigger surprising news came.  I was told my oxygen levels were almost normal.  They saw no reason to admit me overnight.  I was sent home and ordered into quarantine for two weeks.  That was not going to be a problem.  Getting up and walking around was still a challenge.  I think some of that difficulty was due to dehydration.  I had an I.V. bag of fluids while in the Emergency Room, and the walk back to my car was easier than the walk into the hospital.  Anyway, it took almost the entire time I was in quarantine to finally get my energy back and move around my home.

The trip to the hospital was about two weeks ago.  Since then, I've still spent a lot of time in bed.  For most of those two weeks, every time I got out of bed to do the smallest task, I had to go back to bed to recover.  But, my quarantine ends today, and I can finally move around with a lot less exhaustion. 

I may be a couple of weeks late, but I can now wish you a Happy New Year!  I still hope this year is going to be better than 2020.  However, judging by the way things have started, I'm not holding my breath.
2 Comments

Who Could Have Predicted?

12/16/2020

2 Comments

 
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Nobody would have thought it.  I mean, seriously, who could have predicted 2020?  This year has felt like the longest decade of my life.  Yours, too?  We didn't see it coming.   Nobody did.  And, it isn't even over yet.  When I was a kid, I remember it was common to see predictions for the coming year.  I don't know if any of them ever came true, but they were were always a fun read.  But, nobody ever predicted a year like 2020 with a nasty little virus, new vocabulary like "social distancing", a quarantine - for two weeks - to "slow the curve", and the complete disappearance of toilet paper from all stores.  No, nobody was crazy enough to predict any of that.   

So, it got me thinking.  What are some of the more spectacular blunders people have predicted in the past?  I'm sure those people never predicted a computer or the Internet.  They probably never would have made their predictions if they knew that today anyone could look up their mistakes on a Google search.   But, the blunders were predicted and they are out there for people like me to find. 

Here are a few of my favorites.  Of course, the information is off the Internet.  So, read on knowing that not everything you find on the Internet is actually, partially or totally true.

Technology
1865 - The unidentified person quoted in the Boston newspaper is most likely thrilled to be forever unknown.  Why, you might ask?  He said, "Well-informed people know that it is impossible to transmit the human voice over wires as may be done with dots and dashes of Morse code, and that, were it possible to do so, the thing would be of no practical value."

1876 - on a Western Union internal memo.  "This telephone has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication.  The device is inherently of no value to us."  Perhaps in 1876, teenagers didn't go out to restaurants with their friends?

1878 (approximately) - J.P. Morgan's father, Junius Morgan, warned his son that electricity was just a fad.  As sons have done throughout time, J.P. ignored his father's advice.  He invested heavily in Thomas Edison and General Electric.  His home in New York City was the first private residence in the city to have electric lighting.  Edison, perhaps the only man I'm going to quote who could see the future, claimed, "We will make electricity so cheap that only the rich will burn candles."

1878 - Oxford professor, Erasmus Wilson, was in the dark when he said, "When the Paris Exhibition closes, the electric light will close with it and no more will be heard of." 

1878 - British Parliamentary Committee on Edison's light bulb, "… good enough for our transatlantic friends … but unworthy of the attention of practical or scientific men.”

1878 - According to Sir William Preece, Chief Engineer, British Post Office, "The Americans have need of the telephone, but we do not.  We have plenty of messenger boys."

1880 - Henry Morton, president of the Institute of Technology put his foot in his mouth when he wrote about Edison's light bulb.  "Everyone acquainted with the subject will recognize it as a conspicuous failure." 

1899 - Charles H. Duell, the U.S. commissioner of patents, said, "Everything that can be invented has been invented."

1932 - Even everyone's favorite genius, Albert Einstein, couldn't get it right every time.  He declared, "There is not the slightest indication that nuclear energy will ever be obtainable.  It would mean that the atom would have to be shattered at will."

1961 - T. Craven, FCC Commissioner, said, "There is practically no chance communications space satellites will be used to provide better telephone, telegraph, television, or radio service inside the United States.”

1966 - Long before the Internet existed and a nasty little virus came onto the world's scene, Time magazine  published an article called "The Futurists".  The author predicted what might happen in the coming decades and guessed about the possibility of remote shopping. Whoever wrote these words of wisdumb knew it would never catch on. You might ask why, but you won't like the answer.  It's because "women like to get out of the house, like to handle the merchandise, like to be able to change their minds."

1985 - Erik Sandberg-Diment, in The New York Times, said, "For the most part, the portable computer is a dream machine for the few … On the whole, people don’t want to lug a computer with them to the beach or on a train to while away hours they would rather spend reading the sports or business section of the newspaper.”

1995 - Clifford Stoll, in a Newsweek article entitled "The Internet? Bah!", didn't see the writing on the wall.  "The truth is no online database will replace your daily newspaper."

1995 - Robert Metcalfe, with a very long and impressive resume in technology, predicted in InfoWorld that the Internet would "soon go spectacularly supernova and in 1996 catastrophically collapse."  He promised to eat his words if ever proven wrong.  And, Metcalfe lived long enough to do just that.  In a keynote speech in 1997, he pulled out the page with his predictions from a magazine, tossed it into a blender, and then drank it down before a live audience.

2005 - Sir Alan Sugar, a British business magnate, said, "Next Christmas the iPod will be dead, finished, gone, kaput."

2007 - Steve Ballmer, businessman, investor and CEO of Microsoft, is quoted in USA Today, "There's no chance that the iPhone is going to get any significant market share.  No chance."  It appears that he missed out on this investment.

Transportation
1800 - Professor of Natural Philosophy and Astronomy, University College London, Dr. Dionysys Larder's line of thinking was not on the right track.  "Rail travel at high speed is not possible because passengers, unable to breathe, would die of asphyxia."

1825 - The Quarterly Review asked, "What can be more palpably absurd than the prospect held out of locomotives traveling twice as fast as stagecoaches?"

1859 - Associates of Edwin L. Drake refused his suggestion to drill for oil.  "Drill for oil?  You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil?  You're crazy!"  Obviously, they never watched the Beverly Hillbillies.

1864 - King William I of Prussia was on the wrong side of train transportation when he said, "No one will pay good money to get from Berlin to Potsdam in one hour when he can ride his horse there in one day for free."

1902 - Simone Newcomb, a Canadian-American astronomer and mathematician, didn't know the persistence and determination of people from Ohio.  A mere 18 months before the Wright Brothers flew in Kittyhawk, Newcomb said, "Flight by machines heavier than the air is unpractical and insignificant, if not utterly impossible."

1903 - The president of the Michigan Savings Bank offered advice to Henry Ford's lawyer.  The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty, a fad."   How many horses in your garage?

1904 - Ferdinand Foch, French general and military theorist, said, "Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value."

1909 - In an edition of Scientific American, it was stated, “That the automobile has practically reached the limit of its development is suggested by the fact that during the past year no improvements of a radical nature have been introduced.”

1916 - Aide-de-camp to Field Marshall Haig at a tank demonstration,  “The idea that cavalry will be replaced by these iron coaches is absurd.  It is little short of treasonous.”

1936 - In The New York Times, "A rocket will never be able to leave the Earth's atmosphere."

1956 and 57 - Richard Ban Der Riet Woolley, Astronomer Royal, and Sir Harold Spencer Jones, English astronomer, did not grow up watching Star Trek and Star Wars.  Woolley declared, "Space travel is utter bilge."  Jones said, "Space travel is bunk."  He said this a mere two weeks before Sputnik orbited the earth. 

1968 - Businessweek had no business discussing foreign automobiles.  "With over fifteen types of foreign cars already on sale here, the Japanese auto industry isn't likely to carve out a big share of the market for itself."

Entertainment
1837 - Philip Hale, Music Critic, couldn't spell Phillip correctly or judge music.  He declared, "If Beethoven's Seventh Symphony is not by some means abridged, it will soon fall into disuse."

1916 - How could an actor, producer, director, studio founder and legend like Charlie Chaplin get it so wrong?  "The cinema is a little more than a fad.  It's canned drama.  What audiences really want to see is flesh and blood on the stage."

1921 - David Sarnoff, commercial radio and television pioneer, responded to a call to invest in radio.  "The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value.  Who would pay for a message sent to no one in particular?"

1927 - H. M. Warner, of Warner Brothers, didn't know what he and his siblings were getting into.  At least, that's how it appears when he asked, "Who the hell(o, how are you?) wants to hear actors talk?"  Well, maybe, just maybe, he was talking about actors on politics?

1930 - British journalist, editor, publisher and politician C.P Scott is quoted as having said, "Television? The word is half Latin and half Greek.  No good can come of it."

1939 - The New York Times ran an article by Orrin E. Dunlap Jr. that claimed, "The problem of TV was that people had to glue their eyes to a screen, and the average American wouldn't have time for that."

1944 - Emmeline Snively, American model, said, "You better get secretarial work or get married."  She gave the advice to Marilyn Monroe.

1946 - Darryl Zanuck, a movie producer for 20th Century Fox, might have been a Times subscriber.  He clearly didn't see our future when he said, "Television won't be able to hold on to any market it captures after the first six months.  People will soon get tired of staring at a plywood box every night."  If he wasn't already long dead, he would be at the thought of a 98" flat screen with more features that anyone could possibly understand for the bargain Christmas price of $59,999.99.  I kid you not.

1955 - Variety wrote, "It will be gone by June."  What will be gone?  Rock 'n' Roll. 

1962 - A Decca Records executive didn't love them, yeah, yeah, yeah.  He told band manager Brian Epstein, "The Beatles have no future in show business.  We don't like your boys' sound.  Groups are out; four-piece groups with guitars, particularly, are finished."

1966 - A United Artists executive, rejecting Ronald Reagan for the lead in The Best Man, said, "Reagan doesn't have that presidential look."

1969 - Gus Bally, Arcades Inc., said, "People won't want to play these electronic games for more than a week, not once we start selling pinball machines for the home."

1996 - Barry Cunningham, editor at Bloomsbury Books and most likely to kick himself - where he deserves to be kicked - for the rest of his life, to J.K. Rowling.  "You'll never make any money out of children's books."  Two years later, the world was introduced to Harry Potter.

Health
1839 - Dr. Alfred Velpeau, surgeon you would never want to meet, said, "The abolishment of pain in surgery is a chimera.  It is absurd to go on seeking it … knife and pain are two words in surgery that must forever be associated in the consciousness of the patient.”

1873 - Sir John Erie Erichsen, British doctor to Queen Victoria, announced, "The abdomen, the chest and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon."  The first brain surgery was performed in 1884, by British surgeon Rickman Godlee, to remove a brain tumor.  The first heart surgery, in 1895, was performed by Axel Cappelen in Oslo, Norway.  There is no documentation whether either of these doctors were wise or humane.

1883 - Lord Kelvin, President of the Royal Society, said, "X-rays will prove to be a hoax."  He might have thought differently if he grew up watching Superman.

1954 - W.C. Harper, National Cancer Institute, is quoted, "If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor one.”

History
1486 - At a time when everyone knew the world was flat, the committee advising King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain on matters of Christopher Columbus, said, "So many centuries after the Creation, it is unlikely that anyone could find hitherto unknown lands of any value."

1616 - According to the Roman Catholic Church, "The view that the sun stands motionless at the center of the universe is foolish, philosophically false, utterly heretical ... the view that the earth is not the center of the universe and even has a daily rotation is philosophically false, and at least, an erroneous belief."

1872 - Pierre Pachet, another surgeon you would not want operating on you, said, "Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction."

1888 - Simon Newcomb, astronomer and the only one to make this list twice, observed, "We are probably nearing the limit of all we can know about astronomy.”

1895 - "It doesn't matter what he does, he will never amount to anything."  Albert Einstein's teacher to his father.

1905 - Grover Cleveland, U.S. President and surprisingly married, "Sensible and responsible women do not want to vote."

1930 - Robert Millikan, American physicist and Nobel Prize winner, declared, "No 'scientific bad boy' ever will be able to blow up the world by releasing atomic energy."

1939 - Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister, said, "Atomic energy might be as good as our present-day explosives, but it is unlikely to produce anything very much more dangerous."

1941 - On December 4, U.S. Secretary of the Navy, Frank Knox, made a declaration to calm the nation concerning Japanese aggression in the Pacific.  "Whatever happens, the U.S. Navy is not going to be caught napping."  We all know what happened at Pearl Harbor three days later.

1974 - Margaret Thatcher, British Stateswoman, said, "It will be years - not in my lifetime - before a woman will become Prime Minister.  Okay, in case you are too young to know, she became Prime Minister.

2012 - The date on the Maya calendar for the end of the world was December 21.  Okay, they were wrong, but it feels like they were only off by eight years.  If it really ended that day, at least I wouldn't have turned a year older.  My birthday was the next day.

The Bible
I haven't included any prophecies from the Bible here.  They all come true.  But, if any of these people that I wrote about lived back in ancient Israel, every single one of them would have kept their mouths shut.  It was not healthy to make any false predictions.  The standard was really high in Israel.  One mistake.  One little slip up, and you were considered a false prophet.  And, what happened to false prophets?  They were killed, every one of them.  Perhaps Mark Twain understood all of this predicting better than anyone else.  He said, "It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt."    
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A Thanksgiving Miracle

11/26/2020

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When I was a kid, there was no competition.  Christmas was my favorite holiday.  I mean, seriously, how could it not be for kids with stuffed stockings, presents under the tree, and grandparents at the door with loads of even more gifts?  Yep, I loved Christmas.  I still do, even though I don't put up a stocking and can't think of anything I need under my tree. 

But, over the years, Thanksgiving has moved up on my list of favorite holidays.  There are no fat men in red suits, no bunnies with chocolate eggs, and no little kids at the door expecting more sugar than anyone needs until the next time October rolls around.  As far as I can tell, Thanksgiving remains one of the few holidays that hasn't been spoiled by commercialism.  Okay, I admit that it's good business for the local grocery store, but after a meal, what else do people spend money on for Thanksgiving?

This is a holiday all wrapped up with giving thanks.  If you celebrate the day the way it is meant to be, you should count your blessings.  It's a time to have an attitude of gratitude.  During the quarantine, I've worked on several children's books.  Triple Gratitude with Assorted Monsters teaches a lesson about looking for the three best things that happened during the day.  It's something I do every night.  But, on Thanksgiving Day, perhaps everyone would do well to triple their triple gratitude.  We have so many blessings to be grateful for.

This morning, I listened to an interview by radio host Eric Metaxas.  He has a passion for history, but before he delved into his story, he had his own thoughts to share about Thanksgiving.  He said, "God blesses you to be a blessing."  That'll give me a whole lot more to consider when I count my blessings tonight. 

Metaxas has written several children's books, but in this interview, he spoke about Squanto and the Miracle of Thanksgiving.  I never heard of this story before.  If you want more information on the man and the miracle, you can read further in Metaxas' book If You Can Keep It.

Anyway, most of us know "in the year 1620 the Pilgrims came over.  The good ship Mayflower brought them o'er the sea."  But, did you know that prior to 1620, merchant ships sailed down the east coast of what would become the United States to trade with the local people?  I mean, seriously, who knew that?  And, sadly, not all of these merchants were the nicest of people.  In 1608, Captain Hunt sailed around Massachusetts Bay and he wasn't interested in a tea party.  Before he headed back to Spain, he wanted to capture a few Native Americans to sell into slavery.  Twelve-year-old Tisquantum, also known as Squanto, was one of these captives. 

Sadly, most of the names of people sold into slavery - then or now - remain nameless.  Not many have the chance to escape slavery and leave their mark on history.  Squanto is one of those rare ones who did just that.  When he arrived in Spain, the young boy was purchased by some monks.  Their main goal was to teach him the Christian faith.  Their secondary goal was to find a way to return him to the New World.    That was no easy task in the early 1600s.

The journey home included a stop in England for a few years.  Finally, in 1618, Squanto got passage back to the New World on a ship where he worked as a translator.  And, he made it back home to his village of Patucket in the following year.  Unfortunately, his entire village had been wiped out by disease.  For a while, he lived in a village of a neighboring tribe before moving out on his own.  The return trip to the New World was not at all what he had thought it would be.

Meanwhile, back in Europe, the Puritans searched for religious freedom.  They left England for a decade in the Netherlands.  But, eventually, they sought their new life in the New World.  Their goal was Virginia, but instead, they landed in what they called the Plymouth Colony in present-day Massachusetts.  And, they were not prepared for the harshness of Massachusetts weather.  Half their population died in that first winter.  The Puritans were desperate and prayed for a miracle.

Now, sometimes, things happen that are just too coincidental to be coincidence.  They must be divinely inspired.  Plymouth Colony, where the Puritans settled, was the very land where Squanto's people had lived.  Imagine the shock when a Native American who spoke the Queen's English came to the colony after that horrible winter.  John Winthrop, one of the colony's early governors, wrote that Squanto was "a special instrument sent of God".  He had no doubts that this man was an answer to their prayers.  Squanto taught the people skills they needed in order to survive: how to plant corn, where to best fish, and how to hunt.  Then, he negotiated a peace with the neighboring tribes that lasted fifty years. 

Ask any Puritan you happen to see, and they will tell you the story of Joseph who was sold into slavery and then turned around and saved the entire nation of Egypt as well as his family.  Joseph said that the slavery was not good, but God used it for good in His plan to use him to save everyone.   The same can be said for Squanto.  Nobody can say that slavery is good, but it was part of the path that taught this young man English and spared him from the plague that killed his tribe.  Without that life journey, Squanto would never have assisted the Puritans when they prayed for help.  Without his help, the colony probably would have failed with everyone perishing or moving back to England.

I don't know if Squanto ever participated in the famous first Thanksgiving.  He died of a fever while guiding an expedition around Cape Cod with Governor William Bradford.  Nobody is sure what exactly happened.  Some suspect he was poisoned.  But, it is safe to say, that this one man had a remarkable influence in the early development of our nation. 

However, if Squanto is a miracle that saved the Puritans and helped to bring about the first Thanksgiving, there is also an anti-miracle about that meal.  In my research, I found that most likely there was no turkey or mashed potatoes that day in Massachusetts.  What!  It was much more likely that they dined on venison.  Heavens to Bambi!  And, as for potatoes, they were just making their way from South America to Europe at that time.  They wouldn't have been in Massachusetts when they were celebrating with gratitude.  As far as I'm concerned, the first Thanksgiving meal was not a "real" Thanksgiving meal.  And, if I had been there as one of the first Thanksgivers, that night when I counted my blessings, the menu without turkey or mashed potatoes wouldn't have made my gratitude list.


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Making My Mark

9/17/2020

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Some people make their mark carving their initials into the bark of a tree.  I have a cat that leaves his mark – or puddle – every day on the bathroom floor mat.  (I have no idea why he doesn’t use the litter box literally two feet away from that mat.)  I tend to make my mark with art, but it was a little unusual while in Alaska.

My sister and her husband run a fishing lodge in the Last Frontier.  It’s a family thing.  Their son is the chef.  Their older son runs the other family lodge a little ways down the Naknek River.  They all fish, hunt, hike and love anything outdoors.  Their fishing guides didn't think I was really related to them.  How could it really be possible?  Seriously, give me a screened-in room free of mosquitos, no-see-ums and white socks, then toss in Internet access, and I’m in my own little paradise.  But, I do have skills that my sister and her family appreciate.

PictureIt was a small workspace to create all that cuisine.
The kitchen at the river camp is my nephew’s domain.  He has such a passion and gift in that realm.  What he creates, and the ingredients he uses in some of his creations, are not fully appreciated by all of the fishing guides or their clients.  Some people enjoy cuisine.  Others prefer hamburgers.  Hunter makes cuisine.

He started learning at my sister’s elbow before he was even a teenager.  And, he flourished.  Now, he runs that show.  My sister helps when and where she is needed.  And, one of her tasks is writing the daily supper menu on a chalkboard so the guests know what their taste buds are in for.  I’ve seen my sister’s handwriting.  It’s usually very flowery with circles for the dots on her letters.  However, she took her time with the lettering on the menu.  She didn’t need my help at all.  But, after a few days in Alaska, she thought maybe I should be the one who wrote the daily menu.

Okay, okay, I’m an artist and we all know it.  I’ve made more than my share of posters and cards.  As an art teacher, when my students created illuminated manuscripts, we practiced calligraphy.  Almost universally, every student hated that.  Why practice calligraphy when you can print out beautiful fonts on the computer?  But, I practiced as well since I love working with letters.

It shows.


PictureBeautiful to look at. Better to eat!
In my five weeks of menu writing in Alaska, I had more comments than I’ve ever had in my entire life about my lettering.  I guess nobody expected it in rural Alaska.  Fishing guides whose lives revolve around fish and beer (not necessarily in that order) stopped to tell me how beautiful my lettering was.  One guest photographed every menu all week long because he knew his wife would enjoy the photos.  Every week, without fail, each group of fishermen stopped to comment about my writing skills.  Some of the men touched the lettering to see if it was somehow painted with a stencil.  There were no stencils.  I used special chalk markers that I’d never seen before.  There were no lines.  But, the text was always close to centered and nearly perfect.  I told people that I practiced a lot and oozed with talent.

My older nephew said the lettering was “ridiculously good”.

My brother-in-law said that is just wasn’t possible that anyone could create lettering like that.

The chef said, “It’s just lettering!  Okay, you do it well, but it’s just lettering.”  Hmmm . . . it was his domain.  He should get most of the praise.  I made sure I praised him.

My sister just said, “My brother is an artist.”

Even on my final night in Alaska, a new group of fishermen asked who did the lettering.  I told them to really enjoy it that evening.  It was my last night so for the rest of their stay, they would have normal handwriting.  (And, by the way, my sister said that the next evening her normal handwriting was mocked - probably more by family than guests.)  Anyway, I didn’t leave my sister completely without my talents.  At the top of the menu board, I painted “Welcome to Naknek River Camp”.  They will have that to remember my stay for a long time to come.


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There is one other project as well that will remind my family about me for a while.  Above the entrance to the dining hall, someone painted their business logo many years ago.  The painting didn’t hold up well in Alaskan sunshine, rain and winter.  Later someone else tried to touch up the sign.  I’m just going to limit my comments to the fact that he said he wasn’t an artist.  Of course, even an artist can’t create a masterpiece without proper materials.  When the guy painted the blue water, he didn’t have blue paint.  So, he used blue nail polish.  Under this sign is the location where most visiting fishermen pose for their group pictures of fishing in Alaska.  My sister was embarrassed by that sign's condition for a very long time.

But, I visited Alaska.

In the final few days that I was at Naknek River Camp, my brother-in-law decided that maybe it would be a good idea for me to repaint that entire sign.  There was a lot of lettering involved.  Need I say more?  And, since I had the proper supplies to do the job, the end project was completed to my satisfaction.  But, I finished it only the night before I left.  The sign wasn’t installed when I headed to the airport.  However, everyone who saw the work was very pleased.  I was pleased as well because I know when this sign is weathered, worn, frozen and faded, they know who to bring back to Alaska to repair it the right way.  And, I would love to return to King Salmon.

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